Match: 09
/ 187
Won
by 8 wkts
Team |
Total |
Legbourne CC |
138 - 5 |
S. Dobner 2 - 17 |
|
|
|
FFTMCC |
140 - 2 |
D. Edwards 50, N. Hebbes
48 |
Here I am embedded in The MAD nest in a pre-match warm up as I
peer over the top of my cider and take in the atmosphere for a piece of Gonzo
journalism fitting for the debauched scenes being witnessed. Most MADsters here are regaling from
the night before. Some are cackling endlessly at the ravishing tales from
antics thus far. Others hang their heads at the bar getting ready for the
final effort to get them over the finishing line that is the Tour Marathon. The final pub stop
of the Louth Tour 2009. Shorten's gambling education continues as he hears of the
poker showdowns in the Barns the night before. Bear witness readers - he has
a lovely family, kids, house and woods right now. I only wonder how long
before all is lost and he lies in a gutter humming Louth songs covered with
long paid off builders invoices as the only memory from the happy days…. It’s
clear Jake the Kettle has had little sleep through four days as he mumbles
into his lager and studies the bramble scratches on his feet gained from
cross country pissing the night before. Sir Gonzo Leggarte
the Towel Headed Church Spire Terrorist giggles quietly to himself in the
corner, still struggling to get the visions of Jake falling down the ditch
out of his head. Westmoreland, resting skip, peers out of his one good eye at
Dobners recalcitrant shin splints witnessed by
Reevsie who looks on in what can only be described as… despair. Church Terrorism – Gonzo style. Good job the Ambassador of the tour is here again then, fresh
from Organ removal and a smack on the temple (with helmet) While fraternising
with the opposition a war cry goes up “Five minutes and out t’ pob” Five minutes? Time for another pint then. Skipper for the day is Thornton Smith - one of the few
uninjured members of the team and a fitting draw winner for skippership with this being his 100th game for
the MAD. A feat possibly due to being a Tour Veteran who knows how to surf
the waves of organised chaos jumping from one social swell to the next before
she breaks and deposits the suckers who continued onto the beach. A thirty over game is called to preserve what aching limbs we
can and ensure an early departure homeward bound to cradling mothers and
wives. A sigh of relief spreads throughout the ensemble. The Fennel is called upon with some interesting results given
the track is artificial. The main thing apparently, coming from the Fennel
Meister, is that she stands. Hebbes raising both arms aloft in exultation
exclaims “She Stands YES! Trouble at both ends!” Evidence of Hebbes’ insanity has been
forwarded to the Mental Health dept. Opposition for the day is Legbourne Cricket Club. Great Chairman,
great swings and great barbeques all squeezed in between fields of rolled hay
and a housing estate providing target practise with their over-sized
satellite dishes protruding from their un-netted vantage points. Legbourne win the toss predictably and once more into the
breach we go. Surprisingly I witness here some exalted spirits. Dead cat
bounce maybe. The Team raising itself as one for one last monumental effort.
The bowling attack starts well with opening bowlers Reeves (6-1-25-1) holding
a great line and length for the first over to castle the swinging Oliver (6)
who tried to hit every delivery from the off into the surrounding
countryside. Shorten (5-0-10-0) from the Satellite Dish end extremely
economical deliveries to the Ambassador Parkinson (31) who was playing for
the opposition in some form of diplomacy role. Progress was slow for the
opening three bats and this only continued when Hoskins (6-0-24-1) was
brought in with his wily spinners bowled with creaking, possibly broken
digits. Parkinson's wicket fell to Hoskins with a genuine faster ball
getting an edge to the ever watchful ever safe Edwards at first slip. Legbourne's innings accumulated slowly with some healthy
partnerships but slow partnerships nonetheless as the onlooking crowd near
the hutch started to get restless. Getting off to a flyer in the home run game seemed to act as a
pain killer for various injuries as Howarth overcame chronic back injury to
keep for thirty overs and even Dobner (4-0-17-2) managed to overcome the pain
of shin splints and thrown out arms by getting two top Legbourne wickets of
Grist (50) and Wilkinson (22). When Howarth bagged the final wicket to fall
off the skip Thornton's (1-0-9-1) bowling the final tally only just reached
138 – an eminently gettable target. This is a proper cricket tea! Tea is consumed with flair – Legbourne sportingly provide a
barbeque which The MAD stare at quizzically due to the fact
that there seems to be enough bread for all of the meat and what is
that strange green salad like stuff. Bizarre indeed. Back to the scoring
hutch we wearily tread to witness The MAD batting line up attempt a famous
tour victory. The innings starts
extremely positively with D. Edwards (50) and N. Hebbes providing a much
needed solid batting opening. A partnership builds as the run rate required
comes down nicely following late cuts and cover drives from the changed man
Edwards. Hebbes joins in too, and when sledged by the Ambassador Parkinson
fielding in slip for the opposition, the champagne moment is destined. “Bet
you can’t hit the ball into the scoring hut” Parkinson gloats with that
cheeky caricature grin. Very next ball Hebbes rises to the challenge and
despatches one over the bowlers head for a one bounce four straight into the
dark recesses of the pavilion. If this was Champagne it would be Krug Clos du Mesnil
1995. Right there right then,
we all knew we really couldn’t possibly lose this game. D. Edwards celebrates his 42 – and then his
fifty. Edwards continued in his
drive towards fifty finally succumbing to one which probably kept low.
Excitement on the boundary seemed to be rising somewhat for finally Hebbes
was coming into his own for the Fantasy Cricket points – much needed by those
in the pack chasing the runaway leader – possibly the best Fantasy Manager The MAD has ever had. Hebbes was fast
approaching his fifty before, much to the utter despair of everyone watching
who have Hebbes in their Fantasy Teams, he skied one into the safe hands of
the Legbourne Keeper on 48. Enter Shorten, unleashed
to the centre strip like a rabid Tiger hungry to sink its teeth into the
nearest Antelope. Huge swings followed, and huge sixes are hit – one reaching
far over the local basketball field and fortunately striking an upstanding
conifer tree and rebounding back into the ground otherwise the ball would
surely have been lost somewhere North of Cleethorpes. Skipper T. Smith (right) watches his team canter
home. Needless to say the
required runs were soon struck up, just the two wickets lost and Dobner (1 n.o.) and Shorten (22 n.o.) saw
the MAD home with 4.3 overs to spare. The MAD return back to the home pub for one last refreshment and
presentation to Stevie P for exemplary organisation skills to provide what
must surely go down in club history as being possibly one of the best tours The
MAD has ever had… until next time of course. ‘Hoskers’
|
*
Far from the MCC versus Legbourne
CC Played at Legbourne, 16 August 2009 Legbourne CC won the
toss and elected to bat Far from the MCC won by 8 wkts Far from the MCC debuts: none |
09 / 187 30 over match |
Team |
Legbourne CC |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
# |
Batsman |
How Out |
Total |
Balls |
4s |
6s |
FOW |
1 |
W. Oliver |
b Reeves |
6 |
|
- |
1 |
1-6 |
2 |
S. Parkinson |
c Edwards b Hoskins |
31 |
|
6 |
- |
2-45 |
3 |
A. Grist |
b Dobner |
50 |
|
7 |
- |
3-107 |
4 |
R. Wilkinson |
b Dobner |
22 |
|
- |
- |
5-132 |
5 |
S. Loveley
* |
c Howarth b Smith |
9 |
|
- |
1 |
4-116 |
6 |
J. Sanders |
not out |
4 |
|
- |
- |
- |
7 |
M. Smith + |
not out |
6 |
|
1 |
- |
- |
8 |
R. Collinson |
|
|
|
|
|
|
9 |
R. Cox |
|
|
|
|
|
|
10 |
J. Wilkinson |
|
|
|
|
|
|
11 |
B. Chapman |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Extras |
(W5, B5) |
10 |
|
|
|
|
|
TOTAL |
(for 5 wickets, 30 overs) |
138 |
|
|
|
|
# |
Bowler |
Overs |
Maidens |
Runs |
Wkts |
|
1 |
Reeves |
6 |
1 |
25 |
1 |
|
2 |
Shorten |
5 |
0 |
10 |
0 |
|
3 |
Westmoreland |
6 |
0 |
34 |
0 |
|
4 |
Hoskins |
6 |
0 |
24 |
1 |
|
5 |
Hebbes |
2 |
0 |
14 |
0 |
|
6 |
Dobner |
4 |
0 |
17 |
2 |
|
7 |
Smith |
1 |
0 |
9 |
1 |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Team |
Far from the MCC |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
# |
Batsman |
How Out |
Total |
Balls |
4s |
6s |
FOW |
1 |
D. M. Edwards |
b Oliver |
50 |
(55) |
8 |
- |
1-91 |
2 |
N. J. Hebbes |
b Oliver |
48 |
(74) |
8 |
- |
2-133 |
3 |
D. Shorten |
not out |
22 |
(22) |
1 |
2 |
- |
4 |
S. L. Dobner |
not out |
1 |
(2) |
- |
- |
- |
5 |
J. C. W. Hotson |
|
|
|
|
|
|
6 |
I. C. Leggate |
|
|
|
|
|
|
7 |
M. K. Reeves |
|
|
|
|
|
|
8 |
T. P. W. Smith * |
|
|
|
|
|
|
9 |
M. T. Westmoreland |
|
|
|
|
|
|
10 |
J. D. Hoskins |
|
|
|
|
|
|
11 |
I. Howarth + |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Extras |
(W13, LB1, B5) |
19 |
|
|
|
|
|
TOTAL |
(for 2 wickets, 25.3 overs) |
140 |
|
|
|
|
# |
Bowler |
Overs |
Maidens |
Runs |
Wkts |
|
1 |
Chapman |
4 |
0 |
12 |
0 |
|
2 |
Cox |
6 |
0 |
33 |
0 |
|
3 |
Collinson |
4 |
1 |
16 |
0 |
|
4 |
J. Wilkinson |
6 |
0 |
44 |
0 |
|
5 |
Oliver |
5 |
0 |
22 |
2 |
|
6 |
Sanders |
0.3 |
0 |
7 |
0 |
|
MOTM: D. Edwards Champagne Moment: N. Hebbes’ boundary
into the pavilion Buffet
Award: T. Smith’s tasteless vegetarian
pasties (with out-of-date sauce) |
Opposition:
V055 / 01 Ground: G045 / 01 Captain: C015 / 02 |