Match: 17
/ 438
Lost by
5 wkts
Team |
Total |
FFTMCC |
187 - 8 |
M. Reeves 48, J. Hoskins
43 |
|
|
|
Blacksmiths & Artisans CC |
191 - 5 |
M. Bullock 2 - 18 |
In Alan Sillitoe’s
famous novel, Saturday Night and Sunday
Morning, the protagonist Arthur Seaton, escapes the mundanity of his
daily life into a fantasy world of his imagining. The book is split in to two
unequal parts, focusing mainly on the Friday night as Arthur gets blind drunk
in a drinking competition and eventually comes unstuck with the husband of
one of the two sisters he’s carrying on with. On the Sunday morning Arthur,
recovering from his injuries, enters a dream like state with a marginal grip
on reality. Alan Sillitoe was one of the “angry young men” group of writers
including John Osbourne and Harold Pinter who defined the kitchen sink dramas
of the post war era. So what does this have
to do with Day Three of the FFTMCC Tour to Minehead? Well, F all really.
There were no angry young men, just
of bunch of happy go lucky, heavily inebriated old men, although some were escaping the mundanity of daily
life. On the Friday night, the
tourists had divided in to three unequal groups. Group 1, The Slippers Brigade (James Pearson)
were tucked up in bed by 20:30 with a copy of the Reader’s Digest. Group 2, The Moderates (Martin Westmoreland,
Matt Bullock et al) wended their merry way back to The Beach Hotel at around
midnight after a brief trip to Wetherspoons. Group 3, What Goes on Tour, Stays on Tour, (balls drainer Russ, Lee, Spam,
Pops Williams et al) no record exists of how they got home. Group 3. There was an unequal
representation of the three groups at breakfast the next morning. Whilst some
tucked into fried egg, hash browns, bacon, sausage (feeling queasy yet Spam?)
mushrooms, tomato and beans, others could only manage cereal and toast whilst
others (Pops) did not appear at all. So what’s the best cure for a hangover?
Certainly not an hour’s ride on a diesel filled, ex-school bus circa 1980,
but that’s what we were treated to in the form of Berry’s coaches. It was to
everyone’s disappointment that the driver was not called Terry. Spam and Pops
headed straight to the seats at the back, like the cool kids they are, whilst
Lee headed to the front in case a speedy exit was required. Eventually we
were delivered to the picturesque village of Blagdon Hill for an hour in the
pub prior to the game, where we nearly drank them dry – of diet coke and
cloudy lemonade. Spam sought comfort in
the bowling alley on a comfy bed of cricket bag and concrete. Anyone
concerned for his wellbeing could simply glance at the CCTV behind the bar
which acted as a kind of video baby monitor. Suitably refreshed he roused
himself to join the rest of the team for the 0.7 mile walk, nearly a country
mile, to the ground. It is said that you can
enjoy cricket whether you’re 18 or 80. Our hosts, Blacksmiths & Artisans
seemed to have taken this literally, as they all appeared to be either 18 or
80. Our team were greeted by B&A’s skipper R Watkins, who chatted amiably
to tour organiser Russell, before being passed to skipper for the day, Lee.
Mr Ainsworth made the classic novice skippers mistake of under playing
himself, whilst packing his top order with members of Friday night’s group 3.
Inevitably Spam (0) lasted just nine balls, before he could retire to a shady
patch of cool grass. Fellow group 3’er, Jake (1) fared little better, whilst
Pops (33) showed that what he lacked in breakfast consumption, he made up for
in swinging the willow. The mantle was then soon passed to the more focused
members of group 2, Reeves (48) and Matt (0). Here’s Matt’s innings is told
entirely from the utterings of Mr Reeves: MR: “Hello
Matt, welcome to the crease, how’s your running at the moment?” MR: “Sorry
to hear that, well we won’t try anything too quick, just keep it sensible.” MR: “YESSSSSSSSSSSSS.” MR: “Sorry,
Matt.” Hoskins was in vintage form with the
bat, including some foot movement. Reeves was soon joined
at the crease by Hoskins (43) and the pair put on a wonderful 94 run
partnership, the stuff of dreams. Timms (1) then showed his Group 3
credentials, until it was the turn of Darley (9) and Newman (17 n.o.) Just occasionally someone will say something, make
a witty observation and BANG, it sticks. This was the case on Friday night as
Lee saw the aforementioned Darley and Newman approaching the bar. “Here comes
Beavis and Butt-Head”. Hahahahaha. And again hahahahaha. That
one is a sticker. Finally, M Rundle (15 n.o.) shows
that What Goes on Tour, Stays on Tour
refers to his batting, whilst skipper and Player of the Season Ainsworth
registered a D.N.B. Tea was an assortment of
scones and delicious clotted cream, also cheese, lots and lots of cheese. As
the teams returned to the field, in warm sunshine, overlooking the wonderful
Blackdown Hills AONB, with a decent total 187 on the board, surely nothing could
disturb this dreamlike rural idle. Reeves whacks one square under the watchful eye
of Cap’n Birdseye. Standout batsman of this
and many other games was L Trottman who hit a Hylam Shallowesque
102 (retired) off just 47 balls (12 sixes). At the other end Judas R Turner
did his best to scupper the B&A run chase with a Geoff Carteresque 27 n.o off 70
balls. He also did a great job of ensuring that we’ll never be invited back
to Blagdon Hill by dropping his bat in the crease and therefore sending back
skipper R Watkins after his suicidal scamper down the wicket. Champagne moment (literally
a bottle of Prosecco from Skipper 2018, if he carries on with the bribery,
Lee Ainsworth) was picked up by Reeves for a decent catch at slip off the
skipper’s bowling. The only other wickets to fall were claimed by Darley and
Bullock (2) as the hosts reached their target with just three balls to spare. We then underpaid our
hosts, before ungraciously refusing to join them for a post-game drink as
Berry’s coach had arrived back early and we were all keen to return to the
bright lights of Minehead. It was then one last gasp of fresh air before
returning accompanied by diesel fumes which caused most of the party to pass
out. We were reminded on the way home that Leon has ginger pubes. The evening was
enjoyable, but not the raucous affair of the evening before. The highlight
was of course the foundational Gary’s Quiz during the obligatory MAD curry
night. This year saw the introduction of a new round, the instant classic
“which is higher?” Sample question, which is higher, the number of catches
taken by James Pearson, or the number of times he’s been out caught? This
round continues to provide pale imitation questions, such as, which is
higher, the number of Sambuca’s consumed by Spam on Friday night, or the
number of runs he’s scored since June? I’ll leave the last
words to Alan Sillitoe through Doreen, one of his characters “I want to go
where there’s life and there’s people”. Thanks Blacksmiths & Artisans, in
Blagdon Hill there is life and there are people. ‘Reevsie’
|
*
Far from the MCC versus Blacksmiths
& Artisans CC Played at Blagdon Hill, 5 August 2017 Far from the MCC won the toss and
elected to bat Blacksmiths & Artisans CC won by 5 wkts Far from the MCC debuts: none |
17 / 438 35 over match |
Team |
Far from the MCC |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
# |
Batsman |
How Out |
Total |
Balls |
4s |
6s |
FOW |
1 |
I. Howarth |
b Jennings |
0 |
(9) |
- |
- |
1-0 |
2 |
J. C. W. Hotson |
b Trottman |
1 |
(25) |
- |
- |
2-14 |
3 |
C. T. J. Williams † |
c b Crossland |
33 |
(22) |
6 |
1 |
3-38 |
4 |
M.K. Reeves |
c Watkins b Jennings |
48 |
(55) |
7 |
- |
5-134 |
5 |
M. Bullock |
run out (Watkins) |
0 |
(3) |
- |
- |
4-40 |
6 |
J. D. Hoskins |
b Hotham |
43 |
(41) |
5 |
- |
6-139 |
7 |
A. Darley |
c Watkins b Jennings |
9 |
(12) |
2 |
- |
7-147 |
8 |
G. J. Timms |
b Trottman |
1 |
(6) |
- |
- |
8-154 |
9 |
J. Newman-Robson |
not out |
17 |
(17) |
1 |
- |
- |
10 |
M. S. Rundle |
not out |
15 |
(20) |
2 |
- |
- |
11 |
L. G. Ainsworth * |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Extras |
W1, LB3, B16 |
20 |
|
|
|
|
|
TOTAL |
(for 8 wickets, 35 overs) |
187 |
|
|
|
|
# |
Bowler |
Overs |
Maidens |
Runs |
Wkts |
Econ |
|
1 |
Jennings |
6 |
4 |
11 |
3 |
1.83 |
|
2 |
Trottman |
7 |
1 |
25 |
2 |
3.57 |
|
3 |
Crossland |
4 |
1 |
26 |
1 |
6.50 |
|
4 |
Pettit |
4 |
0 |
20 |
0 |
5.00 |
|
5 |
Turner |
3 |
0 |
25 |
0 |
8.33 |
|
6 |
McQueen |
3 |
0 |
23 |
0 |
7.67 |
|
7 |
Hotham |
5 |
0 |
17 |
1 |
3.40 |
|
8 |
Fortune |
3 |
0 |
21 |
0 |
7.00 |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Team |
Blacksmiths & Artisans CC |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
# |
Batsman |
How Out |
Total |
Balls |
4s |
6s |
FOW |
1 |
B. Crossland |
c Rundle b Darley |
8 |
|
4 |
- |
1-90 |
2 |
L. Trottman |
retired |
102 |
|
4 |
12 |
- |
3 |
R. P. Turner |
not out |
27 |
|
3 |
- |
- |
4 |
G. McQueen |
c Reeves b Ainsworth |
3 |
|
- |
- |
2-132 |
5 |
T. Stone † |
b Bullock |
5 |
|
1 |
- |
3-137 |
6 |
A. Hotham |
c Darley b Bullock |
8 |
|
- |
- |
4-152 |
7 |
R. Watkins * |
run out (Ainsworth) |
10 |
|
- |
- |
5-175 |
8 |
R. Jennings |
not out |
16 |
|
2 |
1 |
- |
9 |
M. Fortune |
|
|
|
|
|
|
10 |
S. Pettit |
|
|
|
|
|
|
11 |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Extras |
NB1, W7, LB2, B2 |
12 |
|
|
|
|
|
TOTAL |
(for 5 wickets, 34.3 overs) |
191 |
|
|
|
|
# |
Bowler |
Overs |
Maidens |
Runs |
Wkts |
Econ |
|
1 |
Newman-Robson |
5 |
0 |
42 |
0 |
8.40 |
|
2 |
Rundle |
5 |
1 |
27 |
0 |
5.40 |
|
3 |
Darley |
5 |
0 |
17 |
1 |
3.40 |
|
4 |
Timms |
4 |
1 |
26 |
0 |
6.50 |
|
5 |
Hoskins |
3 |
0 |
12 |
0 |
4.00 |
|
6 |
Ainsworth |
5 |
0 |
23 |
1 |
4.60 |
|
7 |
Bullock |
3 |
0 |
18 |
2 |
6.00 |
|
8 |
Howarth |
4.3 |
0 |
25 |
0 |
5.56 |
|
MOTM: M. K. Reeves Champagne Moment: M. K. Reeves’ amazing
slip catch Buffet
Award: J. Newman-Robson’s salmon burgers
with kale salsa MAD
Moment: J. D. Hoskins’ misjudged
catch, running under it whilst swearing |
Opposition:
V095 / 01 Ground: G086 / 01 Captain: C026 / 02 Match No: 35 / 154 |