“Lessons Unlearnt: Part I”
Match: 17
/ 430
Lost by
61 runs
|
Team |
Total |
|
Astons CC |
201 - 5 |
|
J. Pearson 2 - 22 |
|
|
|
|
|
FFTMCC |
140 |
|
I. Howarth 43, R. Turner
19 |
|
|
The last MAD game at
their de facto home of Brasenose was in the final of the Friendly Cup. On
that cloudy September’s day, dreams of an open top bus parade in celebration
of winning some silverware went down the drain. As a brief recap, the
visitors scored more than they should have with one bloke scoring nearly all their runs. In reply, Howarth got
a few before he was caught playing a shit shot to mid-off, pre-empting a MAD
batting collapse and a sullied atmosphere at the pub afterwards. Fast forward
some nine months after that match and… the visitors scored more than they
should have with one bloke scoring nearly all
their runs. In reply, Howarth got a few before he was caught playing a
shit shot to mid-off, pre-empting a MAD batting collapse and a sullied atmosphere
at the pub afterwards.
Being one of those
attractive centrally based Oxford college grounds, on a beautiful day
Brasenose has a dreamy, gratifying aura about it. It holds particular
appeal to visitors, and a large Astons contingent swelled by wags was
complemented by the hardened non-playing alcoholics that support The MAD. This
stereotypical English setting would be completed by an array of picnic
blankets, striped deck chairs, empty beer cans and a stuffed mallard being
hauled through some dog shit by a small blonde-haired boy. With temperatures
hovering in the upper sweaty region, Timms duly lost the toss to inform his insincere
team mates they would be chasing leather in the coming hours. This they did
with Russ Turner opting out by diving wide and over the ball for most the
afternoon. Andrew Darley (8-2-25-1) excelled, however his sole reward being a
beauty to nip back and do for the dangerous J Shea (18). Roberts (6-0-25-0)
and Shorten (8-0-40-0) were perhaps unlucky, whereas Pearson’s (5-1-22-2)
fortune with the ball is in stark contrast to that with the bat, N Clark (0)
somehow dragging some rubbish onto his middle peg.
Williams (centre) returns from self-imposed
married exile. A commendable effort in
the field would be consummated by Timms’ (6-0-37-1) twirlers and Rundle’s
(5-0-32-1) pearlers, with Howarth (2-0-5-0) avoiding any flak by bowling at
batsmen not called R Smith. Ralph’s
sole misjudgement during a chanceless 98 was to believe his teammates were
celebrating his century. They were not, as he soon discovered after clubbing
a six and holing out the very next ball. Astons 201-5 and time for a paucity
of tea. In lieu of Reeves’
mysterious absence, tea became the responsibility of Homer Turner and by
proxy his long suffering missus, Madge. With Carter in the throes of a
hypoglycaemic breakdown due to a shortage of cakes, players were left
pondering what the exact definition of Russ “helping out in the kitchen”
actually meant….
Discussions are had over ways of getting out. In a rapturous and
unforgettable reply, Pearson’s (4) weekend enfeeblement continued apace,
discovering as he did a brand new quadrant of the pitch to get caught out in
(square leg). This worrying slump in form is apparently due to “[his] fucking
pads” and not the ill-advised shot selection as ably demonstrated further by Turner
(19) and Hotson (15). With a lightning quick
outfield and very few demons at work, this was a pitch where the batsman had
to make a commodious effort to actually get themselves out. Never ones to
shirk a challenge and drawing on their vast resources of cricketing acumen,
Howarth (43) and Westmoreland (15) delivered in spades. Martin went first
after the initial disappointment of a botched stumping, before Ian’s
meticulous spoon to Mr Shea went some way to preserving S Smith’s (5-0-24-2)
bowling figures. Unperturbed by the
proficiency of the top order in being shite, Shorten (13), Timms (6) and
Darley (11) equipped themselves admirably in foreshortening their innings.
Their poise and understanding of the situation preceded the incalculably
talented efforts of Carter (0*), Rundle (0), and Roberts (0), adroitly demonstrating
an intelligence of at least an equal footing.
Tall Bob congratulates the Astons on being not as
shit as The MAD. 140 all out and a not so
insignificant 60 balls left to do absolutely bugger all with. Oh, and Colin
Allen recorded figures of 2-2-0-3. Bean Counter Reeves
would have delighted with the fines haul accrued at the pub afterwards, if
less the atmosphere of his team mates, who over the course of at least a
decade, seem to have learnt nothing when chasing a total. We can do better this,
gentlemen. Much much
better. Oh…. ‘C. Ulpable’
|
*
Statto Scorecards
|
Far from the MCC versus Astons
CC Played at Brasenose College, 9 July
2017 Astons CC won the toss and elected to
bat Astons CC won by 61 runs Far from the MCC debuts: none |
17 / 430 40 over match |
|
Team |
Astons CC |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
# |
Batsman |
How Out |
Total |
Balls |
4s |
6s |
FOW |
|
1 |
R. A. Smith * |
c Westmoreland b Timms |
98 |
|
14 |
1 |
5-196 |
|
2 |
J. Shea |
b Darley |
18 |
|
3 |
- |
1-45 |
|
3 |
C. Allen |
c Timms b Pearson |
6 |
|
1 |
- |
2-58 |
|
4 |
N. Clark |
b Pearson |
0 |
|
- |
- |
3-58 |
|
5 |
M. Chandler |
c Pearson b Rundle |
44 |
|
6 |
- |
4-152 |
|
6 |
R. Eaglestone † |
not out |
13 |
|
1 |
- |
- |
|
7 |
S. Saunders |
not out |
4 |
|
1 |
- |
- |
|
8 |
O. Wigg |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
9 |
D. White |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
10 |
D. Kilcoyne |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
11 |
S. Smith |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Extras |
NB1, W3, LB6, B8 |
18 |
|
|
|
|
|
|
TOTAL |
(for 5 wickets, 40 overs) |
201 |
|
|
|
|
|
# |
Bowler |
Overs |
Maidens |
Runs |
Wkts |
Econ |
|
|
1 |
Darley |
8 |
2 |
25 |
1 |
3.13 |
|
|
2 |
Roberts |
6 |
0 |
25 |
0 |
4.17 |
|
|
3 |
Shorten |
8 |
0 |
40 |
0 |
5.00 |
|
|
4 |
Pearson |
5 |
1 |
22 |
2 |
4.40 |
|
|
5 |
Timms |
6 |
0 |
37 |
1 |
6.17 |
|
|
6 |
Rundle |
5 |
0 |
32 |
1 |
6.40 |
|
|
7 |
Howarth |
2 |
0 |
5 |
0 |
2.50 |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Team |
Far from the MCC |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
# |
Batsman |
How Out |
Total |
Balls |
4s |
6s |
FOW |
|
1 |
J. W. Pearson |
c Wigg b
Kilcoyne |
5 |
(15) |
- |
- |
1-21 |
|
2 |
R. P. Turner |
c Allen b Kilcoyne |
19 |
(22) |
4 |
- |
2-29 |
|
3 |
J. C. W. Hotson |
b Ray |
15 |
(33) |
2 |
- |
3-63 |
|
4 |
I. Howarth |
c Shea b S. Smith |
43 |
(46) |
7 |
- |
5-105 |
|
5 |
M. T. Westmoreland |
b S. Smith |
15 |
(20) |
2 |
- |
4-101 |
|
6 |
D. Shorten |
c Eaglestone b Saunders |
13 |
(16) |
3 |
- |
7-140 |
|
7 |
G. J. Timms * |
c Shea b Saunders |
6 |
(13) |
1 |
- |
6-127 |
|
8 |
A. Darley |
b Allen |
11 |
(10) |
2 |
- |
8-140 |
|
9 |
G. Carter † |
not out |
0 |
(1) |
- |
- |
- |
|
10 |
M. S. Rundle |
b Allen |
0 |
(2) |
- |
- |
9-140 |
|
11 |
C. D. Roberts |
b Allen |
0 |
(3) |
- |
- |
10-140 |
|
|
Extras |
NB1, W3, LB2, B7 |
13 |
|
|
|
|
|
|
TOTAL |
(all out, 30 overs) |
140 |
|
|
|
|
|
# |
Bowler |
Overs |
Maidens |
Runs |
Wkts |
Econ |
|
|
1 |
White |
7 |
0 |
25 |
0 |
3.57 |
|
|
2 |
Kilcoyne |
6 |
0 |
35 |
2 |
5.83 |
|
|
3 |
Ray |
7 |
1 |
28 |
1 |
4.00 |
|
|
4 |
Smith |
5 |
0 |
24 |
2 |
4.80 |
|
|
5 |
Saunders |
3 |
0 |
19 |
2 |
6.33 |
|
|
6 |
Allen |
2 |
2 |
0 |
3 |
0.00 |
|
|
MOTM: J. C. W. Hotson Champagne Moment: M. T. Westmoreland’s
catch diving on the boundary Buffet
Award: M. S. Rundle’s coq au vin
with crème fraiche mash MAD
Moment: R. P. Turner’s exhibition of
fielding incompetence |
Opposition:
V046 / 17 Ground: G040 / 57 Captain: C022 / 61 Match No: 40 / 132 |