“We Have All The Time in The World….”
Match: 24
/ 634
Lost
by 23 runs
|
Team |
Total |
|
Isis CC |
146 - 4 |
|
C. Roberts
3 - 22 |
|
|
|
|
|
FFTMCC |
123 - 6 |
|
L. Ainsworth
30*, J. Webster 29 |
|
|
A Cricketing Play 7.45pm – a summer’s
evening, the skies are blue, the light is crystal clear. But it is late summer and it will darken soon. Still, you would think,
plenty of time to finish up before the light goes… Skipper: “OK. So the right hander is looking to cut square and the left
hander is driving through mid-on so we’ll get Tim over to deep point, bring
up Nobby and push Crispin over to midwicket.” It takes a few minutes
to rearrange the field. The bowler starts his run… Skipper: “Hold on, Nobby. Tom, on the one, mate. Up a bit. A bit more.
Nearly there. Yep. Right, Nobby, off stump,
please.” Tom moves seven inches
to his left and thoughtfully scratches his arse. Nobby
trots in, serves up some pie down the legside which is battered for four. Skipper: “Ok then, we’ll move Dan
from third man to deep fine, get Petroc to come in from long on to square leg
and Horatio can sweep up the late cut behind point.” Another five minutes of
conflab and vague movement pass, the skipper gets out his laser surveying
tool and moves slip back one millimetre and again instructs the bowler to
pitch it up on the off stump. The bowler runs up again and delivers a wide
long hoppy bit of flan which is dispatched to the cover boundary. Skipper: “Right, Dave, Dee, Dozy,
Beaky, Mick & Titch - all of you move as one to where that last ball
went…”
Library footage of some Isis tinkering. 8pm Repeat ad infinitum... This was a pretty decent
game, overall, if a bit on the lengthy side. It started in glorious sunshine
but finished in the gloaming as the clock nudged nine o’clock. The MAD
probably would have still lost if we’d finished earlier but the sheer volume
of field faffage was quite noticeable and possibly
not all of it was entirely necessary... It’s likely that our old
rivals Isis are quite well aware of their own predilection for tinkering and they initially requested an 18-over innings
match, which The MAD, who had arrived for an early start, declined, instead
suggesting 10 overs be bowled from each end before switching. Anyhoo.
We’ve had a spell of roasting weather and the Queen’s outfield is baked, rock
hard and skin-removingly severe on the diligent
fielder. The ball flies over the outfield and Isis
opener Stephenson, as he often does, takes full advantage, flaying 9 fours in
a very rapid 37* before retiring at the end of the 6th over. Order, if not sanity
exactly, is more or less restored with the introduction of Dave Shorten and
Tall Bob. Dave goes wicketless but pins Isis down, going for only seven runs
off his three overs, while Man of the Match Bob goes on the spree with a
nifty 3-fer (22). He gets the number three to pull one straight to Webster at
square leg, clips the top of the number 4’s off peg and then sees Ainsworth
pull off a gem of a catch at deep backward square leg, running in off the
boundary to take a low tumbling Champagne moment effort. Gary Timms (1-17) comes
on, beats the batsman with his first two ball and snaffles a wicket off the
third via a surprisingly neat stumping by Russ Turner. At this point, having
wrested back a measure of control from Isis, Isis then do a bit of reverse-wresting
and start scampering lots of highly annoying singles and twos. Paul Bagot and
Lee Ainsworth (or ‘Edward’ as he appears in the scorebook for some profoundly
unknowable reason) don’t bowl badly (and each suffer from very difficult
drops, Timms and Roberts doing very well to get anywhere near them) but the
Isis pair push and scramble the score up to what feels like a slightly better
than par 143-4.
Edward prowling around the boundary. Still and all, the
wicket is a belter, so we don’t feel Isis have set the unachievable (like
say, plucking a number out of a hat, 179), Webster and Edward Ainsworth open
up slowly. Ponting Jnr is handy bowler and at 20-0 off four overs (including
a maiden over) the openers can hear JMO thinking “get on with it!” even if
they can’t actually hear him. Things pick up, though, as a few loose ones are
served up and The MAD start to find the boundary. At 65-1, Webster goes
for 29 (annoyingly, Em [his wife] had played her T20 joker this evening and
someone kindly points out that he’d lost just her 75 fantasy points for just
missing out on a thirty). On the upside, at 10 overs the score is 70-1 and
The MAD are more or less bang on the run rate. Nuno has a busy visit to
the crease, which lasts just 5 balls, and crams in two boundaries, a single,
the breaking of his bat and a smart caught behind as he trudges off with 9 to
his name. Lee follows shortly afterwards, retired, having batted beautifully
for 31*.
Library footage of Williams wanging
one to cow. With 64 required off 9
overs everything is set up for the grand finish. We have Dave Shorten and Joe
Cartwright at the crease, both men in form currently, and they begin well,
running hard and with Joe playing what is probably the whole club’s classiest
shot with his signature Cartwright late cut for four. It’s still looking good
at 97-2, but then arse-biting Nemesis arrives in the shape of part-time bowler,
Stephenson, who delivers what, to quote John Harris’ ball-by-ball WhatsApp
comment, is a: “Calamity over Joe Bowled Dot Two but Darley run out
going for 3rd run Dave caught Two Dot”. To summarise the
calamity: Joe (9) was beaten by lack of pace. Darls
(2) described his own falling as: ”No! No! Oh, go on
then… fknbollocksshitebastadfuckfuckfuckjesuschristJmo,ImeanDave,
why the fuck?!! Oh. That could have been my fault’” which sums it up
nicely. Finally, Dave (10) went double-deluxe and was caught behind and stumped off the
same ball. With new batsmen in and
adjusting, three are scored off the next over and suddenly the required run
rate is up to 10 and the light is fading. Gary (8) and Russ (15*) start off
gamely, reprising their running frenzy against Appleton and keep the
scoreboard moving. However, by this point it is positively stygian and it’s
difficult scoring off the nippy late away swing of the returning Ponsford Jnr
(who, to be fair, comes off a short run).
Timms playing one in an orthodox manner. After attempting a
couple of reverse pulls, which looked like the efforts of a man who had never
actually seen one in real life but had read about them and thought he’d give
it a pop, Gary is finally stumped off Keith Whiter. Paul B gropes his way out
to the crease, locating the batting crease more through echo sonar than
sight. With 29 now needed off 7 balls and the light somewhere between dark
and really really dark, it’s no criticism to state
that he and Russ don’t quite pull it off. Still, it’s been a game
which has switched back and forth between two nicely matched teams and it’s
always good to have a pint in the dusk on a warm evening after a decent
runaround. Even if it would have been nice to have that first pint slightly
earlier…. ’Lord Edward de Faffage’
|
*
Statto Scorecards
|
Far From the MCC versus Isis CC Played at Queens College, 13 August
2024 Far from the MCC won the toss and
elected to field Isis CC won by 23 runs Far from the MCC debuts: n/a |
24 / 634 20 over match |
|
Team |
Isis CC |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
# |
Batsman |
How Out |
Total |
Balls |
4s |
6s |
FOW |
|
1 |
R.
Stephenson |
retired |
37 |
|
|
|
1-49 |
|
2 |
A.
Beavan |
c Webster b Roberts |
20 |
|
|
|
2-55 |
|
3 |
B.
Harden |
c Ainsworth b Roberts |
3 |
|
|
|
3-71 |
|
4 |
M. Abi |
b Roberts |
5 |
|
|
|
4-73 |
|
5 |
E. Burn |
st Turner b Timms |
3 |
|
|
|
|
|
6 |
H. Stoneman |
retired |
33 |
|
|
|
|
|
7 |
P.
Jacobs † |
not out |
28 |
|
|
|
|
|
8 |
J.
Ponsford |
not out |
7 |
|
|
|
|
|
9 |
K. H.
Whiter |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
10 |
A. East |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
11 |
J.
Walter * |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Extras |
NB1, W6, LB3 |
10 |
|
|
|
|
|
|
TOTAL |
(for 4 wickets, 20 overs) |
146 |
|
|
|
|
|
# |
Bowler |
Overs |
Maidens |
Runs |
Wkts |
Econ |
|
|
1 |
Darley |
3 |
0 |
21 |
0 |
7.00 |
|
|
2 |
Hoskins |
4 |
0 |
41 |
0 |
10.25 |
|
|
3 |
Shorten |
3 |
0 |
7 |
0 |
2.33 |
|
|
4 |
Roberts |
3 |
0 |
22 |
3 |
7.33 |
|
|
5 |
Timms |
3 |
0 |
18 |
1 |
6.00 |
|
|
6 |
Ainsworth |
2 |
0 |
14 |
0 |
7.00 |
|
|
7 |
Bagot |
2 |
0 |
19 |
0 |
9.50 |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Team |
Far from
the MCC |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
# |
Batsman |
How Out |
Total |
Balls |
4s |
6s |
FOW |
|
1 |
J. vdG.
Webster |
b Harden |
29 |
(27) |
5 |
- |
1-65 |
|
2 |
L. G.
Ainsworth |
retired |
30 |
(33) |
3 |
- |
2-74 |
|
3 |
C. T. J.
Williams |
c Jacobs b Stephenson |
9 |
(5) |
2 |
- |
3-97 |
|
4 |
D.
Shorten |
c Jacobs b Stephenson |
9 |
(11) |
- |
- |
4-99 |
|
5 |
J. A. Cartwright |
b Stephenson |
10 |
(12) |
1 |
- |
5-99 |
|
6 |
A.
Darley |
run out (Harden) |
2 |
(2) |
- |
- |
6-116 |
|
7 |
G. J.
Timms * |
st Jacobs b Whiter |
8 |
(10) |
- |
- |
|
|
8 |
R. P.
Turner † |
not out |
15 |
(18) |
- |
- |
|
|
9 |
P. A. J.
Bagot |
not out |
1 |
(4) |
- |
- |
|
|
10 |
C. D.
Roberts |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
11 |
J. D. Hoskins |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Extras |
NB2, W6, LB1, B1 |
10 |
|
|
|
|
|
|
TOTAL |
(for 6 wickets, 20 overs) |
123 |
|
|
|
|
|
# |
Bowler |
Overs |
Maidens |
Runs |
Wkts |
Econ |
|
|
1 |
Ponsford |
4 |
1 |
7 |
0 |
1.75 |
|
|
2 |
Whiter |
4 |
0 |
29 |
1 |
7.25 |
|
|
3 |
East |
4 |
0 |
25 |
0 |
6.25 |
|
|
4 |
Walter |
2 |
0 |
23 |
0 |
11.50 |
|
|
5 |
Harden |
3 |
0 |
21 |
1 |
7.00 |
|
|
6 |
Stephenson |
3 |
0 |
16 |
3 |
5.33 |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Note: L. G. Ainsworth retired
on 79-3 (11.0 ovs) |
|||||||
|
MOTM: C. D. Roberts Champagne Moment: L. G. Ainsworth’s
excellent catch at deep square Buffet Award: J. D. Hoskins’ MAD
Moment: J. D. Hoskins run out fiasco
after hearing umpire I. Howarth say “well caught” to a drop and walking out
of crease to pavilion (called back) |
Opposition:
V009 / 044 Ground: G008 / 027 Captain: C022 / 117 Match No: 20 / 190 |