“Some Ducks Have Teeth”

Match: 24 / 637

Lost by 12 runs

Team	Total
Mandarins CC	119 - 5
J. Harris 2 - 10
FFTMCC	107 - 6
L. Ainsworth 38*

There is always a mixture of feelings when our annual fixture with the amicable Mandarins comes around as it signals the near closing of the season for another year, whilst containing the spice of playing a great opposition at a fabulous venue, potentially with an electronic scoreboard, although on this occasion there was no one to operate it.

With the sun setting at 8.04pm the pressure was on to get the game started as early as possible. At 5pm The MAD had assembled 5 players, whereas the touring team was present and correct. On winning the toss the Mandarins elected to bat and then also elected to stand around in their pads for another 20 minutes until we had a bare minimum 9 players to start the match.

Some MAD players arrive but nowhere near the XI one would normally begin proceedings with.

Captain Howarth marshalled his players convincingly and The MAD got off to a good start with Pearson (3-0-11-1) and Howarth (4-0-19-0) bowling tightly and restricting the scoring in the first seven overs, and with Harris taking out two batters in an over and even with Shorten (2-0-17-1) dealing in uncharacteristic flan tarts, the Mandarins were on only 58-4 after 10 overs.

It’s worth noting at this point the appearance of Geoff our 10th player’s arrival in the first half of the innings who was quickly dispatched to square leg, the exact position he was in when he took one on the chin when last on the field at Wootton and Bladon. Get back on that horse Geoff. Which he did and it was good to see him there. As the tenth over rolled to a conclusion The MAD’s 11th player arrived – the master of metronomic reliability himself Mr Rundle. And he jogged straight to his bowling mark to deliver the 11th over to bowl a tight and much needed spell (4-0-15-0) after P Mills (34) had got going especially liking G Timms’ (1-0-17-0) flantastic offerings. Ainsworth arms whirled in sensational disharmony delivering a mixture of flight, speed and spin bamboozling the batters and claiming one fantastic spinning dismissal of T Hawkhead which was a close contender for Champagne moment. All in all, The MAD had kept the runs checked and thus Howarth tossed the ball to Webster for the final over.

A match watched my millions around the globe.

Now that was an interesting decision. Webster is known to be the one bowler capable of bowling genuine jaffas but equally known for unravelling under the pressure of bowling. It’s that tough love Howarth again. There was the pressure of bowling the last over. But also, in this game a wide or a no ball scores two runs but is not bowled again… except for the last over! This was a calculated character-building strategy which four balls in was going to plan. As happens and we all know it, something unclicked and two wides and a no ball later there were still two balls to be bowled. To be fair the scorebook says one over for 7 runs – well done Jan and The MAD in keeping the Mandarins to 119.

Even with the pitch keeping very low at times, speaking for myself I thought we were in with a very good shout at half time. The skipper and those lower down the order also thought the same ordering beers and becoming less well suited to the exact timing of a hitting a speeding red object with a wooden club. Wouldn’t this unfold as another close fixture – some flan dispatched tipping it to us and some decent stuff tipping it the other way? No.

A consummate batting display from one of The MAD’s overseas cricketers (Webster).

The Mandarins were efficient and ruthless, and The MAD were well beaten and well short of their target. Timms (0) was bowled by the county bowler G Porter (good to see her again) in the first over and received sledge of the day from stand in bartender Vicky Howarth “were you playing today, Gary?”. Then followed a long partnership between Pyrah (10) and Ainsworth (38). God knows what Lee’s average is now as he hasn’t been out this decade yet. With Lee going well The MAD were still very much in it but with his retirement things rapidly fell apart. Webster (0) was bowled and held the pose of missing the ball for a good 5 seconds making us all laugh. Shorten (5) was cleaned up by H Foreman with the bail landing nearer the boundary than the stumps. Rundle (12) flashed briefly with two magnificent fours of the same rapid bowler. Harris (14) tried to keep with the escalating rate but came short. Pearson tried but was bowled. And a partially drunken Howarth hit the first ball of the last over for 4 needing 20 but thereafter couldn’t get anything away. So, we ended up on 107 but looked out of it from the midpoint of the innings.

In summary the Mandarins bowled five bowlers without a hint of pastry, and we got walloped. Could we have been as ruthless? Maybe but probably not as good. Well done Mandarins until next year. Winter well. Looking forward to it already.

Mandarins 2024.

Of course, the bar and the silliness after the game at Horspath is the real highlight. The usual unpicking of the game. The usual ridiculously long nomination process for MAD moment, Man of the Match and Champagne moment. The talk of autumn coming. Spam riding two laps of the boundary in the total darkness on J Pearson’s futuristic electric bike and not breaking it. The life enhancing presence of Blake who has been a regular fixture this year and on Tour making us all more accommodating and dafter. We are pretty old and crap on the whole these days, but we are definitely still a good team.

‘Lego’

*

Statto Scorecards

Far From the MCC versus Mandarins CC Played at Horspath CC (Pitch A), 30 August 2024 Mandarins CC won the toss and elected to bat Mandarins CC won by 12 runs Far from the MCC debuts: n/a

24 / 637 20 over match

Team	Mandarins CC
#	Batsman	How Out	Total	Balls	4s	6s	FOW
1	H. Forman	b Pearson	4	(6)	1	-	1-4
2	G. Porter *	b Shorten	16	(20)	2	-	2-48
3	D. Williams †	c Turner b Harris	14	(21)	3	-	3-49
4	J. Lowin	c Webster b Harris	0	(2)	-	-	4-50
5	S. Keayes	not out	19	(28)	2	-	5-97
6	P. Mills	retired	34	(17)	7	-
7	T. Hawkhead	b Ainsworth	1	(9)	-	-
8	A. Heard	not out	7	(17)	-	-
9	J. Porter
10	C. Baker
11	B. Tivey
	Extras	NB3, W13, LB2, B6	24
	TOTAL	(for 5 wickets, 20 overs)	119

#	Bowler	Overs	Maidens	Runs	Wkts	Econ
1	Pearson	3	0	11	1	3.67
2	Howarth	4	0	19	9	4.75
3	Harris	2	0	10	2	5.00
4	Shorten	2	0	17	1	8.50
5	Rundle	4	0	15	0	3.75
6	Timms	1	0	17	0	17.00
7	Ainsworth	3	0	15	1	5.00
8	Webster	1	0	7	0	7.00
Note: P. Mills retired on 94-4 (14.0 overs)

Team	Far From the MCC
#	Batsman	How Out	Total	Balls	4s	6s	FOW
1	L. G. Ainsworth	retired	38	(26)	7	-	1-9
2	G. J. Timms	b G. Porter	0	(2)	-	-	2-47
3	J. S. Pyrah	b Keayes	10	(30)	2	-	3-50
4	J. vdG. Webster	b J. Porter	1	(4)	-	-	4-66
5	M. S. Rundle	b Heard	12	(20)	2	-	5-90
6	D. Shorten	b Foreman	5	(6)	1	-	6-100
7	J. Harris	not out	14	(23)	1	-
8	J. W. Pearson	b G. Porter	3	(7)	-	-
9	I. Howarth *	not out	4	(2)	1	-
10	R. P. Turner †
11	G. Carter
	Extras	NB2, W4, LB8, B6	20
	TOTAL	(for 6 wickets, 20 overs)	107

#	Bowler	Overs	Maidens	Runs	Wkts	Econ
1	G. Porter	4	0	15	2	3.75
2	Heard	4	0	21	1	5.25
3	J. Porter	4	1	11	1	2.75
4	Keayes	4	0	20	1	5.00
5	Forman	4	0	24	1	6.00
Note: L. G. Ainsworth retired on 61-3 (11.0 overs)

MOTM: L. G. Ainsworth Champagne Moment: R. P. Turner’s reaction catch to his own fumble (keeper stood up) Buffet Award: G. J. Timms’ strawberry souffle (fresh strawberries extra cream) MAD Moment: G. Carter coming on to field and immediately being put at square leg (where he was injured last time out)

Opposition: V114 / 005 Ground: G046 / 015 Captain: C007 / 082 Match No: 20 / 191