“A Very Winnable Game”
Match: 25
/ 664
Lost
by 168 runs
|
Team |
Total |
|
Ewelme & Benson
CC |
328 - 3 |
|
M. Rundle 2 - 40 |
|
|
|
|
|
FFTMCC |
160 - 8 |
|
R. Turner 32*, G. Timms
30 |
|
|
Situated in the
Chiltern Hills, South Oxfordshire, the charming village of Ewelme is famous
for watercress growing, aristocracy, Tory politicians and of course The
Shepherd’s Hut – a single bar pub, housing an array of interesting props and memorabilia
to complement the decent ales and cider. If you choose to stroll through the
gaff and past the taxidermy heads on walls, it’s also got a rather nice,
multi-tiered beer garden, which is infinitely more fun than chasing leather
around a hardened, pot-holed field on a Sunday.
The surroundings to the
hardened, pot-holed ground are very pleasant indeed, with grassy embankments
providing excellent views of the cricket for those in attendance. Extremely
affordable palatial mansions nestle among the adjacent hillsides, rolling
wheat fields stretch into the distance, and of course there is the obligatory
kids park where The MAD would spend most of their afternoon retrieving a
bruised fucking cricket ball.
It’s an ongoing
discussion if there is
any point in Russ tossing a coin these days, because the result is a foregone
conclusion and we will then be asked to field first in Saharan temperatures
and chase leather all afternoon. This obviously came to pass, with Ewelme
posting a very mediocre 328-6, with the visitors spluttering and eventually
running out of petrol about 90 minutes into the slaughter. This was a very
different home team to the one that was on show the previous year, featuring
several Teddies Boys who could all snack a ball into RAF Benson. But for
Williams’ Bollinger moment with his direct run out of Grocutt (46), it is
likely the total may have exceeded 400, but as it was, it was thankfully just
a target completely out of reach.
“Spot the Ball” competition. Enjoying the
middle-aged flan tossing were E. Adnitt (ton) and the Wood Bros (half tons).
Not enjoying themselves were bowlers Reeves, Timms and Harris (all half
tons), Howarth and Turner (over ten an over) and Nickel (humped and
wicketless). Rundle (2-40) did enjoy himself of course, holding himself back
to nip out a couple of men with white sticks later in the innings (as is his
want). Though he did fuck the webbing on his hand again. Time for tea, and a
brief respite from gradual, pulverising death out in the middle, whilst
wondering what else you could be doing rather than volunteering your time to
be on the receiving end of a brutal sporting massacre.
Here we find Mr Rundle (batting) having a chinwag
with the enemy about his cheeky 2-for. In reply, if you can
call it that, the corpses of Williams and Hadfield were dragged out to the
middle for final arrangements, Harris ran himself out and Howarth twatted one
to the bucket-like mitts of one of those Teddies’ boys. Mike would then
complete a dream day with a negative balance of -70. This tally would be
achieved by shaving a duck off his earlier efforts with the ball (runs
conceded), followed by the second leg of his orgasmic 5-hour round trip from
Nottingham with the sun streaming through his dusty windscreen. Gary (30) and Russ
(32*) at least gave The MAD total some late gloss (if you can call it that
when wiping down a toilet seat), but defeat by 168 runs really did emphasise
what a complete waste of fucking time this afternoon was.
After taking 25 balls, Mark hits something. The pub was extremely nice
for a quick repair afterwards, and of course the question arose as to why
we’d left the establishment in the first place? Atop the beer garden, it was
there that the title to this report originated after our skipper’s doleful
confession. We would then all climb into various motor vehicles and fuck off
home. ’Bushwhacker’
|
*
Statto Scorecards
|
Far From the MCC versus Ewelme &
Benson CC Played at Ewelme, 10 August 2025 Ewelme & Benson CC the toss and
elected to bat Ewelme & Benson CC won by 168 runs Far from the MCC debuts: n/a |
25 / 664 35 over match |
|
Team |
Ewelme & Benson CC |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
# |
Batsman |
How Out |
Total |
Balls |
4s |
6s |
FOW |
|
1 |
S.
Grocutt |
run out (Williams) |
46 |
(30) |
8 |
- |
1-62 |
|
2 |
E.
Adnitt † |
c Timms |
100 |
(58) |
14 |
4 |
2-166 |
|
3 |
G.
McLauchlan |
b Harris |
31 |
(25) |
6 |
- |
3-202 |
|
4 |
J.
Adnitt * |
b Rundle |
34 |
(19) |
5 |
1 |
4-217 |
|
5 |
L. Wood |
b Reeves |
55 |
(41) |
9 |
- |
5-253 |
|
6 |
R.
Martin |
b Timms |
7 |
(13) |
1 |
- |
|
|
7 |
M. Wood |
not out |
51 |
(25) |
6 |
2 |
|
|
8 |
F.
McElwaine-Johnn |
not out |
1 |
(2) |
- |
- |
|
|
9 |
A. Wood |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
10 |
J. Rees |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
11 |
A. Firth |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Extras |
NB3 |
3 |
|
|
|
|
|
|
TOTAL |
(for 3 wickets, 35 overs) |
328 |
|
|
|
|
|
# |
Bowler |
Overs |
Maidens |
Runs |
Wkts |
Econ |
|
|
1 |
Nickel |
7 |
0 |
40 |
0 |
5.71 |
|
|
2 |
Howarth |
2 |
0 |
21 |
0 |
10.50 |
|
|
3 |
Reeves |
7 |
0 |
70 |
1 |
10.00 |
|
|
4 |
Timms |
5 |
0 |
77 |
1 |
15.40 |
|
|
5 |
Harris |
5 |
0 |
52 |
1 |
10.40 |
|
|
6 |
Rundle |
7 |
0 |
40 |
2 |
5.71 |
|
|
7 |
Turner |
2 |
0 |
28 |
0 |
14.00 |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Team |
Far From
the MCC |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
# |
Batsman |
How Out |
Total |
Balls |
4s |
6s |
FOW |
|
1 |
C. T. J.
Williams |
c Grocutt b Firth |
15 |
(15) |
3 |
- |
1-20 |
|
2 |
R. J. T.
Hadfield |
run out (L. Wood/E. Adnitt) |
8 |
(13) |
1 |
- |
2-24 |
|
3 |
I.
Howarth |
c Grocutt b A. Wood |
10 |
(15) |
1 |
- |
3-45 |
|
4 |
J.
Harris |
run out (M. Wood/E. Adnitt) |
10 |
(18) |
2 |
- |
4-46 |
|
5 |
M. K.
Reeves |
b A. Wood |
0 |
(3) |
- |
- |
5-50 |
|
6 |
M. S.
Rundle |
b McLauchlan |
17 |
(46) |
3 |
- |
6-96 |
|
7 |
G. J.
Timms |
c unknown b Finn |
30 |
(37) |
4 |
- |
7-103 |
|
8 |
R. P.
Turner * |
not out |
32 |
(39) |
7 |
- |
8-151 |
|
9 |
J. A.
Cartwright |
lbw b L. Wood |
14 |
(26) |
2 |
- |
|
|
10 |
J. E.
Nickel |
not out |
5 |
(5) |
1 |
- |
|
|
11 |
J. C. W.
Hotson † |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Extras |
NB8, W8, LB3 |
19 |
|
|
|
|
|
|
TOTAL |
(for 8 wickets, 35 overs) |
160 |
|
|
|
|
|
# |
Bowler |
Overs |
Maidens |
Runs |
Wkts |
Econ |
|
|
1 |
Rees |
5 |
0 |
21 |
0 |
4.20 |
|
|
2 |
Firth |
5 |
0 |
23 |
1 |
4.60 |
|
|
3 |
A. Wood |
5 |
0 |
14 |
2 |
2.80 |
|
|
4 |
Martin |
5 |
0 |
24 |
0 |
4.80 |
|
|
5 |
Finn |
5 |
0 |
13 |
1 |
2.60 |
|
|
6 |
McLauchlan |
5 |
0 |
21 |
1 |
4.20 |
|
|
7 |
L. Wood |
2 |
0 |
21 |
1 |
10.50 |
|
|
8 |
M. Wood |
2 |
0 |
11 |
0 |
5.50 |
|
|
9 |
Grocutt |
1 |
0 |
1 |
0 |
1.00 |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Note: M. J. Finn fielded for F.
McElwaine-Johnn |
|
||||||
|
MOTM: M. S. Rundle Champagne Moment: C. T. J. Williams’
superb direct run out Buffet Award: G. J. Timms’ nosebag of chips (although take your fucking pick) MAD
Moment: G. J. Timms’ branding himself
on a bowling mark after retrieving it in the blazing afternoon sunshine |
Opposition:
V135 / 002 Ground: G119 / 002 Captain: C024 / 112 Match No: 35 / 253 |