“Good Things…”
Match: 25
/ 657
Lost
by 8 wkts
|
Team |
Total |
|
FFTMCC |
146 - 8 |
|
I. Howarth
34*,
T. Kawada-Williams 26 |
|
|
|
|
|
OCCSCC |
150 - 2 |
|
G. Timms
2 - 23 |
|
|
My lovely (nearly
Cotswold) local village pub recently bowed to public pressure and finally got
Guinness on tap. Fed up, as they were, of the raised eyebrows at the
suggestion that Stroud Brewery’s organic stout ‘Big Cat’ was a decent
replacement. It seems plastering Guinness 0.0% ads all over the rugby has
stood the good people at St James’s Gate in good stead. They certainly know
branding. You’re already thinking of the horsies
galloping along the waves whilst humming ‘dundudundundudundun’,
ain’t ya? Points to those
of you saying ‘Leftfield’ in your head. Tick follow
tock follow tick follow tock follow tick. That ad, and the
previous ‘Swim Black’ (featuring an ageing swimmer in Italy racing against
the perfect 119.5 second pour set to Perez Prado’s Mambo No. 5), firmly
embedded the ‘Good things come to those wait’ slogan. The later ‘Compton
Cowboys’, based on cowboys in LA saving horses from the slaughterhouse, and ‘Sapeurs’, depicting everyday people in Brazzaville
turning fashionista’s as they head out and strut their stuff after a routine
day’s work, attempted a move towards the ‘Made of More’ strapline. It was too
late. The ‘wait’ was too ingrained in the public conscience.
Why the hell am I
talking about all this in a cricket match report? Well, the editorial
department has given me artistic licence to be incredibly self-indulgent. You
see, it had been a not accurately known but within a smallish margin of the
record amount of overs since I’d last taken a
wicket. The esteemed James Hoskins is the current holder of said ‘record’.
Toiling, as he did, for 41.3 overs at the back end of season 2018 and the
start of 2019. My last wicket had come at Wantage & Grove on May 11th.
The plumbiest of plumb LBW’s, given the batsman was
stood square in front with the ball wedged between his pads about halfway up
middle. It was now July 9th.
Timms (right) surveys the bowling columns…. I had played 11 games
since that Wantage game, and I tend to bowl a fair bit. That’ll get you
pretty close to 40 overs without a wicket. Here’s the issue though, because
W&G used modern tech (probably using AI to scour our website and putting
in expected scores for us all leaving a grand total of 96.45 for 8.7 after
33.8 overs), we didn’t know exactly when I had taken said wicket. See,
Darley, scorebooks fucking rule! Known stats said it was at least 38.3 overs,
but I knew it was nearer 40 – I 100% didn’t take the wicket in my last over
at W&G. I saved dropping a sitter for that over. The kind of catch a
seemingly drunk toddler accidentally makes. I was at least 2nd on the list,
but was I actually first? Well, I’m not going to reveal that yet, am I?! I’m
not Christopher Nolan. The game then. Ah crap,
I need to go back to before the game. To sitting on a bus with no engine on
(and thus no aircon) after a three-car collision brought my commute to the
game to a juddering halt. It’s a half an hour journey in a car from my house
to Oxford. Let’s call it an hour on the bus. It took me 2 hours 40 minutes on
that day. Luckily, unlike Spam a few years back, skipper Lego had the good
sense to bat first. Granted that may also have been because it was 700
degrees. I arrived about half an hour after the game had started.
Here, Old Joe (right) takes some advice from
Young Dan. Talk was of OCCSCC
stating they usually score between 140 and 180 in a T20. The MAD opted to tap
out at the lower end of this scale at 146. Why exert more effort than
necessary? Nuno (10) got a flyer before missing a straight one. Shaw (23) the
Younger (but perhaps now taller?) combined with a returning T Williams (26)
to biff, flay, edge, and caress a wonderful array of shots around a sunbaked
Brasenose. Cartwright (3) retired hurt a little before that whilst Turner (2)
came to the realisation his turn of pace isn’t quite what it used to be when
taking on a gun arm from the boundary. As is customary, Lego
tonked a few. The tonkiest of all though was Mr I Howarth (34*), who himself
had spent a good portion of the afternoon on Oxfordshire’s beautiful roads.
Ian, unlike Joe C, returned after retiring for the last over. This was after
Bob, Kaito, and MAD Moment winner Geoff has all been and gone. Carter
absolutely flummoxed by his ability to hit a 4 to the point of exclaiming
‘Oh, it’s been a while since I managed that’ in utter disbelief to partner
Timms (6*). 9 runs were added in the final over including a boundary from my
good self that was described by a few in various terms; ‘What a shot!’,
‘Poetry in motion’, ‘More beautiful than the Sistine Chapel ceiling’, and ‘Is
there any point in life anymore?’. Self-indulgent enough, Ed?
The state of The MAD youth academy. As it turned out,
deciding to set a total at the lower end of OCCSCC’s scale was, in hindsight,
an error. This was apparent at the halfway mark with OCCS CC 79-0 with two
retirees already with their feet up and a third not far behind. At was at
this point that the ball was tossed my way. A dot and single didn’t seem bad
given the start from our oppo. The third ball though. Ah the third ball… the
batter advanced but never quite got to the pitch. Up it went. Up up and away to long off. It 100% didn’t have the legs,
that was obvious. It was rather comforting to see the young Shaw looking so
sure as he steadied himself under it to make a tricky grab look relatively
routine. I was happy for him to claim the Champagne moment ahead of the best
shot cricket has ever seen given my drought was over. After collapsing to the
floor in sheer relief I dragged my ailing body up to carry on the spell. 7
balls later I’d snared another plumb LBW. Like buses you say? Not on this
day! FFS. A little hiccup in the OCCSCC innings was easily steadied and then
overcome as the visitors reached their target with on over and half to spare.
Fair play to them. It was achieved with good grace and a lovely sprinkling of
wry humour. As it should be. Right then. 2 balls
added to the 39.3 I knew I was already at. 10 balls wiggle room to 41.3. I
appreciate it’s probably only JMO that cares about
this by now but well done for getting this far. If you did. Would we ever
truly know what the exact number is? Recollections filled the mind that
W&G flashed up wickets and 4’s and 6’s on a little TV as the innings
unfolded back in May. That must mean they were doing ball-by-ball in some
guise. The call went out via Spam, and the screenshots were duly returned, in
some haste. Scroll, Gary, scroll! Where is it? Where the fuck is it?!?
For clarity, the above is Timms’ 5th over of a 6
over spell at W&G. There! Okay. Keep calm.
Add the 5, carry the 1… oh, thank fuck for that! 40.4 overs without a wicket.
Five short. Sorry, JMO. (Yeah, I’m not). It’s true then, good things come to
those who wait. Or, on this day, to those who are late. Dundudundundudundun…
Here’s to you Ahab! ’The Fat Drummer’
|
*
Statto Scorecards
|
Far From the MCC versus OCCSCC Played at Brasenose, 9 July 2025 Far From the MCC the toss and elected
to bat OCCSCC won by 8 wkts Far from the MCC debuts: n/a |
25 / 657 20 over match |
|
Team |
Far From the MCC |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
# |
Batsman |
How Out |
Total |
Balls |
4s |
6s |
FOW |
|
1 |
C. T. J.
Williams |
b S. Rehman |
10 |
(5) |
2 |
- |
1-10 |
|
2 |
D. R.
Shaw |
b W. Rehman |
23 |
(23) |
3 |
- |
2-48 |
|
3 |
J. A.
Cartwright |
retired hurt |
3 |
(6) |
- |
- |
3-57 |
|
4 |
T.
Kawada-Williams |
b E. Hussain |
26 |
(27) |
3 |
- |
4-84 |
|
5 |
R. P.
Turner |
run out |
2 |
(5) |
- |
- |
5-124 |
|
6 |
D.
Shorten * |
b E. Hussain |
18 |
(16) |
2 |
- |
6-127 |
|
7 |
I.
Howarth |
not out |
34 |
(23) |
5 |
- |
7-131 |
|
8 |
C. D.
Roberts |
c unknown b Mehmood |
0 |
(2) |
- |
- |
8-137 |
|
9 |
G. J.
Timms |
not out |
6 |
(5) |
1 |
- |
|
|
10 |
K.
Kawada-Williams |
c unknown b Mehmood |
0 |
(5) |
- |
- |
|
|
11 |
G.
Carter † |
b Mehmood |
4 |
(5) |
1 |
- |
|
|
|
Extras |
NB3, W5, LB6, B6 |
20 |
|
|
|
|
|
|
TOTAL |
(for 8 wickets, 20 overs) |
146 |
|
|
|
|
|
# |
Bowler |
Overs |
Maidens |
Runs |
Wkts |
Econ |
|
|
1 |
S.
Rehman |
4 |
0 |
27 |
1 |
6.75 |
|
|
2 |
Parish |
4 |
0 |
23 |
0 |
5.75 |
|
|
3 |
W.
Rehman |
3 |
0 |
16 |
1 |
5.33 |
|
|
4 |
K.
Hussain |
2 |
0 |
12 |
0 |
6.00 |
|
|
5 |
E.
Hussain |
3 |
0 |
16 |
2 |
5.33 |
|
|
6 |
Parish |
2 |
0 |
29 |
0 |
14.50 |
|
|
7 |
Mehmood |
2 |
0 |
13 |
3 |
6.50 |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Team |
Far From
the MCC |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
# |
Batsman |
How Out |
Total |
Balls |
4s |
6s |
FOW |
|
1 |
J. Lal |
retired |
30 |
|
4 |
- |
1-80 |
|
2 |
W.
Rehman |
retired |
31 |
|
5 |
- |
2-97 |
|
3 |
R.
Kennell |
retired |
30 |
|
6 |
- |
|
|
4 |
U.
Mehmood |
c Shaw |
0 |
|
- |
- |
|
|
5 |
J.
Hayman † |
lbw b Timms |
6 |
|
1 |
- |
|
|
6 |
E.
Hussain |
not out |
29 |
|
2 |
1 |
|
|
7 |
A. Khan |
not out |
8 |
|
1 |
- |
|
|
8 |
K.
Hussain |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
9 |
S.
Rehman |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
10 |
B.
Parish * |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
11 |
L.
Parish |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Extras |
NB1, W7, LB6, B2 |
16 |
|
|
|
|
|
|
TOTAL |
(for 2 wickets, 18.3 overs) |
150 |
|
|
|
|
|
# |
Bowler |
Overs |
Maidens |
Runs |
Wkts |
Econ |
|
|
1 |
Shaw |
4 |
0 |
28 |
0 |
7.00 |
|
|
2 |
Shorten |
3 |
0 |
19 |
0 |
6.33 |
|
|
3 |
Roberts |
3 |
0 |
29 |
0 |
9.67 |
|
|
4 |
Howarth |
2 |
0 |
15 |
0 |
7.50 |
|
|
5 |
Timms |
3.3 |
0 |
23 |
2 |
6.57 |
|
|
6 |
K.
Kawada-Williams |
1 |
0 |
12 |
0 |
12.00 |
|
|
7 |
T.
Kawada-Williams |
2 |
0 |
18 |
0 |
9.00 |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Note: I. Howarth retired and returned in the
final over |
|
||||||
|
MOTM: I. Howarth Champagne Moment: D. R. Shaw’s catch for
Timms’ wicket Buffet Award: K. A. Kawada-Williams’s chicken Ramen (extra spring rolls) MAD
Moment: G. Carter’s stunned amazement
at hitting a ball to the boundary (matching that of the team in general) |
Opposition:
V091 / 002 Ground: G040 / 115 Captain: C016 / 050 Match No: 20 / 198 |